|(I see you! Get away from my socks!)|
....But they don't.
So if I'm not lending them out, and they're not hiding in the back of my closet or in a box in my storage shed, what happened to them?
The answer is obvious: Gremlins.
We've all had encounters with them. Even the most diligent laundry warriors have lost socks to the tiny fiends!
In the end there is really nothing we can do to stop them, unless you know of any good Mythical Creature Traps (please let me know!). All we can really do is try to appease them. Maybe throw a nice dress sock into the wash every once in awhile as bait so perhaps they'll steal it instead of widowing your favorite pair of Christmas socks! Maybe leave out some cobbling supplies and hope that they make you a pair of shoes!...No wait, that's elves.
No matter what you do just take comfort in knowing that you're not crazy, your clothes didn't just disappear...they were stolen by Gremlins.
It happens to the best of us, even the Domestic Goddesses. ^_~