How to Throw an Impromptu Party!

I found this little gem on Skinnygirl Cocktail's FB and just had to share! I mean, sure the video is shameless self promotion, but they do bring up some really great points. I've pointed out in several other blog posts that when I'm planning a party it can take me DAYS to prepare and by the day of the party I've driven myself mad with preparation. So quick tips like this (and you know I love me some quick fixes. lol) can take so much stress out of party planning, especially if you don't have a lot of time.

Happy 5 Years!

Tomorrow (Sept. 9th) marks the 5 year Anniversary of me and my husband's first date! It is also the 2 year anniversary of the day he proposed! I know we're just supposed to celebrate our wedding anniversary (Oct. 20th) from now on but I thought the 5 year mark was pretty special. ^_~ <3

So here's too the Ricky to my Lucy! And to many more happy years together! 

(Actual photo of me and my grumpy hubby!)

We Got This Shit Down!

Martha Monday! (Labor Day Edition!)

Happy Labor Day!

I LOVE BAKING!

No matter what Philosoraptor says, I've always known!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARIELLE!

Join us in wishing Domestic Goddess owner Arielle a very Happy Birthday!

And if you haven't already, check out her latest post!

Party Hostess Mode! Activate!

My Birthday party (which I of course planned myself since I'm an uber perfectionist) is this Saturday so I've gone into full Party Hostess Prep Mode. This means my week is about to be filled with an obscenely over the top cleaning regimen and obsessive party planning and prep....my poor husband. 

Martha Moday: OH MAH GAWD Edition!

Part of me was REALLY glad this turned out not to be the real Martha Stewart. I seriously almost had a heart attack. O_O

On another note: Follow TAPDG on Tumblr!

Philosoraptor has a point...

(Ummm...never really thought about that.)

Martha Monday: Bad Company Edition!

She was forced into this! I just know it!

This perfectly describes me today.

Martha Monday (Hero Edition!)

This is seriously the most wonderful thing I've ever seen. T_T

This is so me. T_T

Happy Martha Monday! (Truth Edition)

And that folks is the REAL point of being a Domestic Goddess! ^_~

Ever had one of those days?

Happy Martha Monday! Olé!

(Martha and Margaritas! Sounds like a Fiesta to me!)

Easy Gardening!

(My scallions after the first few weeks!)

"The next time you have green onions, don't throw away the white ends. Simply submerge them in a glass of water and place them in a sunny window. Your onions will begin to grow almost immediately and can be harvested almost indefinitely. We just use kitchen scissors to cut what we need for meals and periodically empty out the water, rinse the roots off and give them fresh water."

(Quote from Homesteading/Survivalism on FaceBook)

Let me tell you that this has worked like a charm! I'm not the best at gardening so being able to grow my own veggies without the hassle of pots and dirt has been wonderful. Plus it adds a nice decoration to my kitchen! 

(Here are my scallions still going strong after a couple months. Sorry instagram and the lighting made them look a little funky.)

After a few months the roots got too long for the little glass I had originally put them in so I moved them to this fun tiki cup I got this summer! Now it looks like I have some sort of tiki chia pet, which is totally fine with me! His hair is super adorable and tasty! ^_~

For more plant ideas that you can regrow from mature plants and stones check out the Empress Of Dirt!

(Wowwy!)

Be Careful What You Wish For!

Martha Monday!

P.S.- If you have any funny Martha Stewart pictures send them to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll post it on the next Martha Monday!

Reverend Arielle's Cleaning Playlist! :D

 

1 Europe- The Final Countdown (Vacuuming)

2 Benny Benassi- I Love My Sex

3 Italobrothers- Stamp On The Ground (Washing dishes)

4 Alestorm- Keelhauled (Swabbing the Poop Deck)

5 The Dresden Dolls- I Am A Girl Anachronism

6 Eliza Doolittle -Skinny Genes

7 Queen- Don't Stop Me Now

8 Flock of Seagulls- I Ran

9 The Features- From Now On

10 Beastie Boys- Make Some Noise

11 Bobby Darin- Splish Splash

12 Bob Crosy and the Bobcats- Way Back Home

13 Tex Beneke and Margaret Whiting- A Wonderful Guy

14 Billy Idol- Dancing With Myself

15 Bob Dylan- I Want You

16 David Hasselhof- Hooked on a Feeling

17 Rick Ashley- Never Gonna Give You Up (GOTCHA!)

18 Dean Martin- Memories Are Made of This

19 O-Zone- Dragostea Din Tei

20 Gipsy Kings- Hotel California

21 Moody Blues- The Story In Your Eyes

22 The Turtles- So Happy Together

23 The Proclaimers- 500 Miles

Dear Summer,

Martha Monday! (Send In Your Pix!)

(Tru dat, Martha!)

P.S.- If you have any funny Martha Stewart pictures send them to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll post it on the next Martha Monday!

I'm One Lucky Housewife!

I know this is a bit of a deviation from my regular Saturday posts, but I'd just like to say that my husband is AWESOME and pretty much the greatest at giving gifts. Thank you hubby!

 ^_^<3

Cleaning out the fridge....

Cleaning out the fridge

Always makes me feel like this.
|
|
V

Did I mention that I live with two guys who never throw anything away? 

EWWY! T_T

Martha Monday! (Need More Entries!)

(I got this as a Christmas/Wedding present and it is AWESOME!)

P.S.- If you have any funny Martha Stewart pictures send them to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll post it on the next Martha Monday!

Mall Fitness!

Working out at the mall is probably one of the greatest ideas of all time. I honestly don't know why only old people are doing this. EVERYONE should be doing this! Mall walking has been a favorite workout of the elderly for years. They get in early before the stores open up, and you always see them in their little matching sweat suits and ankle weights power walking the length of the mall...I obviously do things a little differently. 

When I was younger I used to be a mall rat and would walk around the mall with my friends pretty much everyday. At the time it didn't seem like much of a workout, but now that I'm out of high school and don't walk as much, walking around the mall for a couple hours really makes a difference!

Here are a few Pro-Tips: 

*Don't just walk the length of the mall, stop into the stores and walk around, it'll give you extra steps but you'll be so distracted you won't notice! (And you won't get bored, stores change their stock all the time, so you always have new things to look at!)

*If you're like me, you don't necessarily want everyone to know that you're at the mall to work out. The solution is simple: Don't wear workout gear, just wear regular clothes (something comfortable). That way you don't stand out.

*Bring a friend! Having a workout buddy is helpful no matter what exercise you choose, and having a friend to walk around with you will make the experience that much more enjoyable and the time will fly by! 
*Take the stairs and not the escalators or elevators. That one should be pretty obvious.

*Remember you're not there to shop! Looking in the stores is fine but taking time to pick things out, try them on, and waiting in line to buy it isn't good for your workout or your wallet!

*If you really want a work out...wear heels (comfy ones). Your calves will get rock solid!

***The opinions expressed in this blog are only that, my opinions, and should not be considered medical advice. Always consult your doctor before beginning a new workout regimen.***

Am I the only one?

(It's a conspiracy!!!)

Martha Monday!

(Martha Stewart and Busta Rhymes...cause that makes sense.)

If you have a funny picture of Martha Stewart send it to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll feature it on the next Martha Monday!

Quick and Easy Monkey Bread w/Caramel

Prep Time: 25 Min

Total Time: 1 Hr 30 Min

Makes: 12 servings

(Pillsbury's Monkey Bread)

INGREDIENTS

3/4 cup granulated sugar

2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

4 cans (7.5 oz each) Pillsbury® refrigerated biscuits

1/2 cup butter or margarine, melted

3/4 cup packed brown sugar

 

DIRECTIONS

 Grease or spray 12-cup Bundt cake pan. 2 Mix granulated sugar and cinnamon in 1-gallon bag. Separate dough into 10 biscuits; cut each in quarters. Shake quarters in bag to coat; place in pan. Mix butter and brown sugar; pour over biscuit pieces. 3 Bake at 350°F for 40 to 45 minutes or until golden brown. Cool 5 minutes. Turn upside down; pull apart to serve. Serve warm.

 

If you don't have a Bundt pan you can substitute 2 (9x5-inch) loaf pans for the Bundt pan. Divide the biscuits and butter mixture evenly between the loaf pans. Decrease bake time to 35 to 40 minutes. 

 

(My Monkey Bread...Nailed it!)

 

 

Random Fact #1274

But we already knew that! ^_~

Martha Monday!

(Haters Gonna Hate!)

Fashionable Hats for the "Brilliant Career Woman".

"The days when diamonds and furs didn't mix with pots and pans are gone for good!"

 I don't know whether to hate this video or love it! lol

P.S.- I like the Salad Bowl hat the best. ^_^

I'm the MAN! (Pictures posted every Thursday!)

(I guess he hasn't learned who's in control yet. lol) ^_~

Martha Monday! (Awesome Edition)

(If you have a funny picture of Martha Stewart send it to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll feature it on the next Martha Monday!)

French Maid vs. Housewife (A New and Better Fantasy)

In recent years I've noticed a strange and wonderful thing; The "Housewife" has become something of a sexual fantasy. For years the "French Maid" has dominated the male sexual fantasy and bedroom roleplay arena, but more and more I'm seeing that give way to the sexy (dare I say Desperate?) housewife! 

"Is it hot in here or is it just me?"

I think part of this has to do with the fact that there just aren't that many housewives around anymore. Women are still running their households, but they're also in the work force, doing the same jobs as men. By the time we get home from work and take care of the rest of the housework we need to do, we're not really in the mood to bring old hubby a scotch and his slippers while he watches The Ed Sullivan Show. 

"Ed Sullivan rules"

In the 50's (and before obviously), yes men's wives were always home to clean and take care of the family, but their wives were also ALWAYS home. They're asking for money, nagging, complaining, and doing all that other stuff we think is fun but men hate, so naturally the idea of hooking up with "the maid" would seem more appealing. A women who keeps the house clean, does whatever you want, always looks nice, always speaks to you in a respectful manner, goes home after she's done, AND isn't your wife. lol

"At your service Monsieur"

Nowadays not only is your wife not in the house all day, but you couldn't afford a maid even if you wanted one! I think overall, money is huge reason for the decrease in the popularity of the "maid fantasy". In real life a maid is only serving you because you're paying her, and will likely do a shoddy job and steal your watch anyways. This is probably a little to close to prostitution for the modern man's fantasy. A housewife on the other hand is serving you (for free!) because she loves you and wants to make your life easier. This is why she strives for perfection in everything she does. Plus you still get the benefit of her wearing a cute little apron! :D

"Dishes are done. Ready for dessert?"

 

Don't believe me? Look around, the evidence is everywhere. There are a million blogs on how to be the perfect housewife, sexy housewife Halloween and roleplay costumes, 50's style aprons all over Etsy, Desperate Housewives, Real Housewives of (Practically Everywhere), Madmen, need I say more?

"We're desperate for your lovin baby!"

Of course, at the end of the day both fantasies are misogynistic, but isn't it nice to have a fantasy that encourages men to find their WIVES sexy for once? Yes, it may be an idealized view of their wife, but at least he's not pretending she's someone else entirely. ;)  

Martha Monday! (WTF Edition)

(WTF?!! CREEPY!!!!!!)

If you have a funny picture of Martha Stewart send it to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll feature it on the next Martha Monday!

Listen up Guys!

(Mmmm...I love me some Fabio!)

Martha Monday!

(We all know Snoop would never call Martha a ho!)

 

If you have a funny picture of Martha Stewart send it to ReverendArielle@gmail.com and I'll feature it on the next Martha Monday!

Monster Garden!

If you'd like to try something fun and new with your garden this summer think about planting a "Monster Garden"! Now if you're like me, you're tired of always having those pesky monsters loitering in your yard at night. The Werewolves howl all night long, the Witches are always stealing your herbs, the Vampires are always trying to seduce your high school aged daughters, and don't even get me started on the ghosts! Your Monster Garden will be filled with all sorts of wonderful plants, historically proven to ward off baddies! 

To take care of your Werewolf infestation, plant some Wolfsbane. Wolfsbane is properly known as Aconitum, and thanks to Professor Snape from "Harry Potter" we know it also goes by Aconite and Monkshood. It's other names are Leopard's Bane, Women's Bane, Devil's Helmet, and Blue Rocket.

To keep away Witches you'll want to plant White Horehound and Juniper. White Horehound is known as an "anti-magical" herb and is believed to repel Witches. Juniper not only keeps Witches away but blocks their evil spells!

When it comes to Vampires you can take a couple of approaches. The most obvious would be to plant Garlic in your garden to try to keep them away. While I don't exactly know why Garlic would repel Vampires, I assume that if you had a super sense of smell, Garlic would be pretty repulsive. If the Garlic doesn't work then you can always plant some Hawthorne. While the plant itself won't repel Vampires, it is said that Hawthorne is the most effect plant to make wooden stakes out of. If I were a Vampire, I wouldn't come into a yard that had a bunch of Hawthorne around! ;)

The plants used to repel Ghosts may already be in your garden and you never knew it! Along with having great medicinal and culinary uses, Sage and Fennel have also been used for centuries to keep away Evil Spirits! In Medieval times, fennel seeds where placed inside keyholes to prevent the entry of Ghosts into your home. The burning of dried sage, known as "smudging", is still commonly used to purify a space (i.e.-Your home) and drive out any Negative Spirits that may linger there. 

Finally, circle your garden with a ring of salt to make sure no harm comes to your plants and voilà! You have your very own Monster Garden!